Archive for the ‘Art’ Category

Good night : Good morning

Came across this movie a couple of days ago on a torrent named “rare desi movies collection”. As usual I looked up the movie on IMDB and decided to give it a go. I really love the movies where there are very few characters and depth in the story. 

So the whole movie is about a phone conversation between a boy and a girl. Total strangers they were, they talked all night. It was amazing how strangers gives you comfort of freedom and free you from the fear of being judged. I really wanna call it a natural psychotherapy. I have just finished this movie and couldn’t keep myself from adding it to my blog. How they conversed, from kinky, flirty talk suddenly changes to relationships, wanting things from life, how different people are, about love and letting go. Not about finding yourself. I really hate this statement when someone says anything about finding themselves. It’s total bull crap. This movie is about creating yourself. At least this is the message I get. There may be a lot of loose ends in the movie, dialogues is all this movie is about actually. And I, being so much in love with the fundamental idea of words and their depth of expression, fell in love with the intensity of conversation that took place in this 120 min movie. Specially the last 20 minutes or so when things got serious and noting you could anticipate. It is one of those movies that when they end, they leave you thinking for so many days. 

A simple recommendation to all of you guys who think expression of words is superior to everything. 

P.s I deleted all the memory of her from my phone. When you watch this movie you’ll know what I meant. Cheers. 


Once Upon A Time In Kuala Lumpur

When I was a little boy my father gave me some advice that I’ve been turning over in my mind since then. He told me that all the good things in life are free. I always doubted his wisdom over this advice because he would also give me money to buy things which were also good. Deep inside, I knew that he meant a great deal more than that but I couldn’t figure it out and got carried away with the gigantic flow of life.

On the first day of my training I reached the office earlier and ushered myself in a room on the 25th floor of Menara TA one. The nameplate of the blue door of that room reads “DA Vinci”. I told myself chances are that this room may be decorated with the paintings of Mr. Vinci, at least Mona Lisa but I was wrong and there was nothing of that sort. Later that day I realized that those nameplates were used to inspire. When the training session began, I saw people from different countries, races, religions and mind-sets and it reminded me of the meetings that United Nations used to have to discuss the problems of the world. We weren’t trying to save the world, but the tiny confusions and difficulties of people that could mean the world to them.On a rainy afternoon, when the clouds were roaring and hovering o

ver the city of Kuala Lumpur, my phone rang and I was distracted from the misty view of the city covered in half darkness and half bright from the balcony of my 29th floor house. Soon as I answered the phone a busy, rushing yet caring female voice spoke on the phone and congratulated me that I’ve secured the job was interviewed for last week. I listened to her further instructions, hung up the phone and gazed back to the view with a triumphant smile on my face. A moment ago, I was looking at the same view trying to look for the signs of melancholy and nostalgia, thinking over the mistakes of my life and now I was just looking at it with composure and comfort.

I have called to the customer care plenty of times in my life and I was curious to know how the things go on the other side of the customer care. Our technical training took place on the huge and magnificent 20th floor of the same building and it was the floor where all the magic happened. One day, I came earlier and decided to observe the floor. I strolled around the floor staring at people without offending them. I saw people wired up in their headsets speaking to the computer screen and moving their hands and arms about as they were having the video conversation with their folks – or as if the caller will look at their gestures and will understand what they were trying to convey. I saw people stretching their bodies, yawning and relaxing. I saw people rushing and running around for answers like in the emergency wards in the hospitals.  I saw people chattering, smiling, laughing, chattering, helping, sharing food, sipping coffee – I saw people coming in less happy, going back happier. I realized that to the world we may be a customer care line but somewhere in the ancient dictionaries of the world we meant a lot more than that. They call it customer care; we call it Mobile Help Desk (MHD).

I was not long before I joined the floor and got accustomed to every emotion in the world under one roof. During my first week most of the people were making presentations and were so excited about it. I came to know that they were the nominees in the Annual Contact Center Awards. I came to me that I’m working with some of the best in the business in the whole country and this feeling, itself, was good enough to make me proud. Assistant managers, Duty managers, support staff were engaged to achieve their best. I became conscious of that fact that everyone is trying to fight their way through; that this department has people with knowledge, skills, wits and passion but I knew that there is always a little room to grow. I understood that customer care is very difficult job at times and although we, as a team and more like a family, made it look very easy but our emotions were challenged each day. Every day inside this building we came, worked, learnt, laughed – everyday outside this building in this same world; babies were born, people got married, divorced, died, people were hired, fired, homes were bought, expensive cars were leased, tears were shed, harsh words were spoken, fear, dread, resentment, jealousy, frustration and rage came and went out like the clouds in the sky and unaware of all this, we worked and laughed.

One of the most important elements of a call center employee is the Time Keeping. I have seen people writing big fat books about how to manage time I have seen my professors lecturing about time keeping but coming to this place – it completely changed my way of thinking about time keeping. In this place we beat time each day. It is quite amazing and at the same time surprising that how a few numbers can contain all of the time? And how a few numbers can time us out? Not in here. Here we beat time every day very convincingly.

 It may sound a little fancy but it is a fact that we work right opposite this giant engineering robot known to world as Twin-Towers. People from all over the world travel to see this infrastructural example and they have to hold their heads high and bend their waists back to make their sights reach at the top. It is different and easy for us – as easy as looking out from the window of our pantry at almost each floor. It is a general phenomenon that a good view off the window brings a lot of good ideas and refreshes the mind and soul. A Lot of agents, when they are upset, come up to the pantry and stare at this huge motherly tower. Sometimes when it is raining, the washed and faded view gives you the serenity and peacefulness of mind and you seem to forget all of your worries. When it is sunny the blazing rays of sun reflect with the silver body of these towers and enlighten our heart and soul and an unknown force takes place inside of us and provides us an immense power to fight against our worries. Standing at the top having an urban view makes you feel like you are the king – on the top of the world and you can make everything possible.

 “Almost every warrior in this battlefield is equipped with the weapons of knowledge, care, support and selflessness – and that we all soldiers join together to make an unbeatable and invincible workforce” said one of our brisk team leaders and I was quite engulfed with this idea of his. People call us on our hotline because they have issues and we help them to solve their issues but they don’t know us, they don’t know how we look like and stuff. Like in those superhero movies when a superhero transforms into his superhero uniform in the night and fights against the evil so that the people can sleep fearlessly. So in contrast of what Navin said, the Resolution team would be our backup team, when we are out of rounds or we are reloading, they are there to back us up – and out AMs are our medipacks. When we make mistakes, or we are hit, they bandage us, heal us, treat us, train us and make sure we are ready to go in again. So in this contrast, on the closure of MHD I think of us have won this battle and conquered. Now we will dig the flag of our success at this point and we will move forward to another check post and prepare our weapons to fight yet another battle of knowledge; for life is a never ending process of learning and moving forward.

My motive of joining here was to learn quickly, leave everybody behind and step the ladder of success in no time. I came here with the dream of achieving the impossible, achieving the knowledge, fame, being needed by the people, gaining power, making decisions and making people acknowledging my wits. But I ended up finding love, family, care, friendship and support. Now I know what my father meant when he said all the good things in life are free. Indeed.

Far Away Places…

The notion of reading a good book, i think, is that it gives you the same feeling as the first cigarette of the day. When you feel your head dizzy, knees trembling and eyes blacking out. I don’t mean literally the same way but that’s the notion. That, you take a book in your hands and expect it to excite you from the moment you lay your eyes on the pages.

My non-social life, these days, has lead me back towards the days when I  used to be a bibliophile and i have found an inevitable joy in getting back to that place again. Just the other day, i was arguing with one of my cousins over the friendship and he told me books are the best friends in your life and you’re lucky to have them. I realized not only that how much I have fallen in love with books all over again, but I also realized that things that I yearned for were drifted away from me and the things I have taken for granted have been the reason of my success. It may sound crazy, it does to me too, but this is how it is.

Not only reading books but I have gone pro in that field now. Paper books, audio books, ebooks and reading about the lives of the authors and what inspired them to write such things. The best way to read a book is of course the paper book because it engages you mentally and physically and somewhat socially too. I am not a much of a fan of ebooks because it takes a lot. But the audio books, oh my Lord! What a beautiful thing that is. In your lone dark room, you wire your self up and start litsening to that book and it takes you to a completely different world. A world of new imagination and ecstasy.

I started off my journey of audio books with Stephen Chbosky’s “Perks of Being a Wallflower”. Though it was not a long book and story was quite simple and I was able to omit out the good parts and the bad while listening to it, and then I icompared my criticism with the other critics and I realized I was getting better in understanding the art of writing. Then I started the F. Scott Firzgerad’s “The Great Gatsby”. I’m so much in love with this book that am going to read the paper version of the book now. I watched the movie best on this novel released in 70s with Robert Redford in the lead role and I’m excite to watch the 2013 version of the same book based movie starring Leonardo DiCarpio. Moreover, I read the biography of the author; about his life, events, how he grew up and how he ended his life in the 40s by drinking to death.

I listened to the Italian classic “Les Miserables” by Victor Hugo, Lolita by Vladimir Nabokov, Great Expectations by Charles Dickens, A Tale of  Two cities by Charles Dickens so far. In my limited social circle my friends are anti to books and literature and I am growing my love for the books and authors each day. So i don’t get to share with them how I feel about certain things. Then I realized that I have a blog and I have the rest of the world to share with. May be they would like the books that I read and they would want to read them. May be they also love books and they tell me about their good reads.

Now, I wanna be a writer. I wanna start off with some ad agency writing advertising lines to help the companies sell the nylons, juices and clothes, like the most of the greatest authors did. Ambitious. I know… Then i wanna write for the college magazine and try to impress the opposite sex and fall in love….. WAIT!! my college days are over I did not took this opportunity when i had… Alas!

In 2004, I was student of  Bachelor’s of English Literature. I skipped by reasoning that this is too difficult and boring stuff. Today when I’m dealing with books and authors most of my day I went through my University’s website and found out that the Books I read for amusement and inspiration – most of them were in my syllabus. Now those places are far far away.  Alas!! Comedy of emotions…


Company of Women…

When a man enters into a room, he brings his whole life with him. Be it a hotel room, bedroom, bathroom, office chamber. He has million reasons to be at some other place but walking into that room is like a check point of his life span.  He always carries the happy parts along with him; to share.

If we just ask that man how he ended up in that room, he would tell plenty of reasons. Just ask him. He will tell you how he got there, when he wasn’t actually planned to be there but how surprised and happy he has found himself after reaching there. He would tell you how lost he was and how he forgot where he was actually going, and then how he woke up and strove forward. He’ll tell you about the times he thought and dreamt about being   perfect but he wasn’t. And then at times he would smile wisely and tell you that world is not perfect place and he would tell you how contented he is to know this fact. And of the fact that the You’re born alone and you would die alone and this world has just imposed some rules on top of you just to make you forget those facts. He would tell you that he wouldn’t forget those facts and he lives like there is no tomorrow, because there isn’t one. Known of the fact that he ain’t perfect and not going to be and accepting that one day he would be perished alone. Too much for a room. A man’s whole life.

Moves to the other checkpoint where he feels the emptiness and seclusion.That’s where he thinks about woman. No matter how strong a Man might be or pretend to be, the absence of woman is a twinge in his heart way more powerful than the memory itself. History witness that greatest warriors, fighters, kings gave away their blood, pride, legacies, kingdoms for the sake of woman. Deep inside in his heart, he would always feel the need for the opposite sex to fill an inevitable empty space.  Men without the affection from their beloved would end up weeping in front of whores. Still he ends up with a woman. He pain is woman, and the cure is woman. He would realize that he found someone, someday. He makes his choices, but he would know what woman wants. Every woman wants choices, better choices, but in the end no one wants to be one of a hundred in a box. She is unique and she makes unique choices and she chooses him.  He would tell you that she would want to tell the whole world that HE is mine and that she would mark her man with her lips and with the tenderness of her existence HE would become her possession.

When a man enters into a room, he brings his whole life with him. Too much for a room. Perhaps…

While It Lasts…

Its the oldest story of the world. One day you’re 17 and planning for someday; And then quietly and without you ever really noticing, someday is today, and that someday is yesterday. This is your life.

We spend most part of our lives, thinking, planning, wanting and pursuing, without knowing what’s going to come next. It is very sometimes that we think over our mistakes, think about re-do them to master verdict. And it is quite a few times that we think about our regrets and try to fix them, redeem ourselves from the guilt we’ve been carrying along. Funny thing happens when we are unable to recognize our regrets. It is because regret comes in many shapes and sizes; similar to when we do bad things for good purpose. Some are bigger regrets, like, when we let down a closer friend and escape the pains of the regrets and we think we’ve made a right choice. Some of us hardly think about regrets because they are too busy in moving up in life. Sometimes, we need to fight with our mistakes to come in terms with the past. And sometimes, we bury the ghosts of our past by promising to change our ways. But regrets are not necessarily in the things that we did, biggest regrets are in the things that we didn’t do. Like the simplest things that we didn’t say to our loved ones; the promises that we didn’t do to make someone happy; the calling someone’s name when it was too late; roads that had to be traveled by; people those had to be seen; people to be missed; people to be forgotten; people to be forgiven; desires to be followed in different climates; things that we didn’t do; places that we didn’t go; moments that we didn’t live. We often end up thinking that all is going to go away by the time how would you deal with it as lost is it is there?

Technically, I would stand with those people who let go of such feeling and strive forward to cope with other possibilities, but personally, I wouldn’t want to leave bad taste in anyone’s mouth before I more forward. Actually, nothing as such happens. It is very difficult yet so important to keep balance in your life and we can’t do it perfectly. Never. But at least, in the process of trying to making things better and trying to fix things from the past, we have this self-realization and self actualization. We know what kind of people we are, or were and have become.

How many times we see a dream and it seems so real that when we wake up we aren’t sure what to believe. We would desperately want to fall asleep and continue that dream. But that’s no way to find the reality. Sometimes, I believe, whole life is stranded in a dream and only way to find out the reality of that dream is to wake up and face the what lies inside your soul. In those dark reflections of your soul, you would never find yourself alone. The society is there. Have you ever tried to look into your picture carefully and wondered who is the stranger in the background? Despite you, how many people would have seen your picture(s)?  So it means, you’ve been in many peoples lives without knowing it. May be you’ve been part of someone else’s dream and they are in the same state of retreating towards the dream as you. Neither you chose to be there nor you happened to be there. Imagine, you could be the big part of someone else’s life, without even knowing it. It might bring pain or happiness.

Happiness, too, comes in many forms. Sometimes in the company of good friends, a good job, new car, a post card anything. And also the feeling when you play a big role to help someone else’s dream come true. And you find yourself happy. Its perfect to be happy by having nothing because you never know what this feelings feels like. Because sometimes pain becomes a very huge part of our lives and we are too deprived to recognize our little happiness. But pain doesn’t last forever and someday you’ll realize that this feeling of pain is so unfamiliar, and in that moment you’ll find yourself happy again. Use your head and follow your heart, the world is full of magic, you never know when the next miracle is gonna come from.

These Ties That Bind…

So finally the long and struggling road has come to an end and I took a deep breath and looked in the sky to fill my eyes with God’s grace and feel triumphant. But Oh my God!, there is still a new long road to travel, guess what? this is life.

Troubles that KL had given me in the past couple of years, were easy to forget this time while having a 2 month long vacation back home in Pakistan. Soon as I arrived back here, new challenges were ready and I decided to fight a dual with them. Dead on. New people and places have always fascinated me and I’m glad to witness yet another event in my life such as this. The Employee Induction for the first week of my new job. It was fascinating and exciting and funny. Hell lot of new things I did in my life for the first time in this week. I tried my best to act as a sick bastard who pretends to have done and known everything, but someone might have noticed, i’m not sure.

I always knew the people from all over world would be the same in a lot of terms and here I’ve seen it. Our batch has people from Nigeria, Malaysia, Zimbabwe, Chad, Botswana, Iran, Iraq, Indonesia, Philippians and Pakistan. Now this is funny. Why are people always so happy when they collide with someone from the same place? I met a few and felt as if we are the only ones who can talk, know and understand each other. It’s okay that we share a same language but?? I still am looking the reason for this excitement. No wonder I’ve been back stabbed by a few while having the same feeling but still… What happened in Karachi back then when we passed a man in the street? Did we invite them to join us? Did we just talked them? Pretended to be good to them? Never. so why?

Besides that, I’ve met a few good people during the induction process. Up until Friday, i was thinking this is going to be the first weekend of my working life in this country and I so badly want it to happen as soon as possible. But soon as it came, I started missing office and people. I believe this is the plus point. Sooner I get myself institutionalized with the place the faster I would grow. This is going to be a great period of my life. I would try not to make the mistakes that I’ve made in the mast to blow things up. But I’m sure somewhere in tomorrow, I’m going to make some new mistakes,  and God bless me please!

Bad Timing…

I knew this would happen and one of these days you will turn your back on me. Honestly, I shouldn’t be sad but I’m not a super-human character from a movie but I surely can pretend but not for long. 

Darling, you’ve hit me at the worst possible time. Your timings were always imperfect and you did the same. You knew, I was fighting for us, fighting for the future, for us to be together. you knew what i was going through, and this past would never leave me alone. This Nostalgia is going to tear me apart; but you promised me to collect my pieces and and regenerate me, and you had pretty much done that. Honey, I’m not complaining but your timing wasn’t good, you left me on the shore, with wild waves. You knew i couldn’t swim, and are a surfer. Just a few steps ahead and things could’ve been different. But your timing was really bad.

Love, I can’t the person who I used to be, or who I am right now; but i can try and change the person I wanna be. But if changing myself is the only deal between us then i’ts more a trade and darling there is no trade in love. We dreamed of watching starts together, and you left me in the dark. I didn’t gave you dark, but that is only when you get to see the stars. But your timing wasn’t good. Just a few steps ahead…..!!!